Trauma is an emotional response to a distressing event, a series of emotionally disturbing events, or a life-threatening event. If you’ve experienced trauma, it can deeply affect your sense of self. You may experience long-term effects on your emotional and physical health. However, feeling disconnected, anxious, or hyper-vigilant doesn’t mean you are broken – it means your body is responding to something painful that you’ve experienced. Please know that healing is possible! Rebuilding trust in yourself again is a key part of your healing. Let’s explore some practical steps you can take to find your healing and what that healing may look like for you.
How Trauma Impacts Self-Trust
Trauma can bring about feelings of shame, self-doubt, emotional dysregulation, and hypervigilance or numbness. You may attempt to avoid thinking about the trauma and feeling the emotions of it all. While this is your body’s response to feeling unsafe, you are in a state of survival and not living as your most authentic self.
You may experience Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). When a person experiences a traumatic event in their life, their body responds automatically to feeling threatened. The brain releases cortisol and adrenaline, which can trigger the fight-or-flight response. Trauma can affect the brain’s structure and performance, particularly in the amygdala, hippocampus, and prefrontal cortex.
- Amygdala – The amygdala is responsible for processing emotions, especially fear. Overactivity in the amygdala can lead to heightened anxiety and fear responses.
- Hippocampus – The hippocampus is also part of the limbic system, and is part of memory formation. The hippocampus may shrink or reduce in function, impacting learning abilities and memory.
- Prefrontal Cortex – The prefrontal cortex regulates emotions and aids in decision-making and behaviors. Trauma can cause reduced activity in the prefrontal cortex, leading to difficulty in regulating emotions, controlling impulses, and higher-level thinking.
You Are Not Broken – Why These Responses Are Normal
If you have experienced trauma, you have probably experienced some of the trauma response of fight, flight, freeze, and fawn:
- Fight – When your body feels it’s in danger, your brain sends signals throughout your body to prepare for a physical fight. You may experience a tight jaw, grinding your teeth, crying, a desire to stomp or kick, an upset stomach, or feeling intense anger.
- Flight – The flight response is often described as running away from the danger. Physical responses to flight mode can be feeling fidgety or tense, a restless body that won’t stop moving, constantly moving your extremities.
- Freeze – The freeze response is when your body does not feel like fighting or fleeing. Instead, you may feel frozen. Being in freeze mode can make you feel stiff, heavy, cold, and numb. You may feel a sense of dread. Other physical responses may be a loud, pounding heart.
- Fawn – The fawn response is more prominent in people who grew up in an abusive family or situation. A person in a fawn response will often feel there is no other option than to do whatever it takes to diffuse or avoid the danger. If the source of danger is an abusive relationship, a typical fawn response may be to do what it takes to make the person happy rather than take care of yourself.
It’s important to note that these trauma responses are normal. They are adaptive survival responses, not character flaws. The human body responds in the best way it knows how to keep you safe.
Rebuilding Self-Trust – 5 Practical Steps
Remember, the key to healing is rebuilding trust in yourself again. The following steps can help reestablish your sense of safety and control over your life again.
- Start with small, safe choices. Allow your body to reconnect with safety through predictable routines in your daily life.
- Practice self-validation. Replace inner criticism with compassionate self-talk. Be kind to yourself, give yourself grace, and love yourself the best that you can.
- Connect with your body through grounding exercises. Breathwork, progressive muscle relaxation, and sensory-based grounding are all great examples. Try different techniques and do what works best for you.
- Seek safe, supportive relationships. When you are hurting deeply, it can feel like nobody understands your pain. However, isolation is not the answer. Finding supportive people who will listen with compassion can help you feel seen.
- Work with a trauma-informed therapist. Working with a trauma-informed therapist can help support you in your healing process, identify patterns, and help you build new emotional support tools.
What Healing Can Look Like
The process of healing from trauma isn’t linear or a straight path. It will have ups and downs, setbacks, and then great strides of progress. Your healing will be an ongoing journey, not a destination. You may sometimes feel that your healing is happening slowly, but give yourself grace and allow the healing process to flow naturally. Some real signs of progress may look like asking for help without feeling guilty and feeling more grounded. You will notice the trauma triggers, but respond differently. Eventually, you will feel safe in your own body again. Remember, you are not broken. You are healing. And one day you will look back at this time of healing and realize just how far you have come, and how brave you truly were.
If you’re struggling, know that you don’t have to do it alone. Support is out there. You can find the support and compassionate care you want with Becoming Behavioral Health & Wellness. We offer convenient online counseling appointments in Illinois and Minnesota to help you focus on your well-being. With our expert counseling, therapy, and medication management options, including both traditional medications and plant-based alternatives, to help you feel your best. If you’d like to learn more, give us a call at 708-441-9240 today!
